Our house was built in 1885 and the studio we're rebuilding is like opening a can of worms. The building we thought had been a boarding house for squirrels turns out to be the Hell's Angels headquarters of the hood- racoons. We have torn the entire ceiling out by now and yes there is no mistaking the size of that poop indicates coons. The reason the lights didn't work was that Rocky Racoon had chewed through the wires.
So we all know there ain't much money in pottery so my new idea is to trap friggin' coons and sell them to pet lovers. I can't shoot them without fear of doing hard time in an orange jump suit in a place where I just might be the cutest of the pack and this time that would be a baaaaaaaaaaaaad thing. There were some good squirrel recipes so now how about coon! Ya know when I was a kid I had a Davy Crocket hat my dad bought me at Niagara Falls with a real racoon tail. I've always been a lover of hats. I wonder if the animal lovers would object to racoons without tails. My job at Sheridan is coming to a close so I have to get entrepreneurial again. Pets or hats???????????????????
Place raccoon in a 350 degree F oven and roast til tender.Drink bourbon 'til you don't care that you are eating coon.Serve with sweet potatoes and more bourbon.
Raccoon in a stew sounds pretty good!
your pal Mark