Romancing myself

April 10th is my birthday and I wanted to celebrate my love for myself. 

What would you like for dinner on your special day, my little pumpkin?

Oh my little sugar plum (said in a deep masculine voice) I would like the beer butt chicken! I'd like a can of Molson's Canadian shoved up a Cornish hens butt, some mushroom fried rice, a salad and a damn fine glass of Pino Grigio. Your wish is my command my honey glazed donut. 

Oh and muffin, I know how much you love your music "What would be your pleasure tonight my precious one? 

Oh sweet pea, how considerate of you to think of all this on my special day. I'd like to listen to something really sad. John Prine's new release The Forgiveness Tree sounds like he has a lot of shit to get off his chest. 

Oh my little carnation I know how much you like the beauty of flowers on your dinner table so I went and bought you another anthurium. They are so damn sexy and they

seem to be able to live with you thru thick and thin. They also seem to bloom and flourish under your care.

 Don't get cheeky my little bon bon or I'll put on the camouflage, jump in the Ford F-150 pick up and go to the bowling alley and quaff a few pops with the boys!!!!! 

Just as dinner was beginning to get sickening and I was ready to toss my cookies with all this corny talk I decided to go out and check the mail. There was a B-day present from my friend Judi Dyelle. Grass died a year ago this week. I talked with Grass and Judi every Saturday night for over 3 years. It was Grass who encouraged me to pick up a brush. He gave me his touring quiver of brushes.

Thank you Judi for the thoughtful gift of a brush

 Thank you for making my day, Judi. I know the message. Slow down, write, draw and smell the flowers. Thank you both for joining me for dinner. I have asked Sugar Plum to leave. I can't stand that phony insincere flattery!